Starting with what I’m not might be the most appropriate here– I’m not at all related to the mental health field. I have no training in counseling or anything like that. I’m just someone who has stared grief in the face many times and who is stumbling about in an attempt to deal with the worst possible of losses. Even though I’d lost people before, losing my son turned the world upside down in a way I’d never expected. Four years later, the stillbirth of my daughter shattered the world again. This blog is my attempt to ‘cope’ with that grief while helping others in similar circumstances.
Please feel free to email me at grey_rain@lycos.com with comments or questions.
hello. i’ve just finished reading a few of your blog entries. i just wanted to say how truly sorry i am for the loss of your son. i lost my father back in 2000 and a few good friends throughout my life. and i know that all of my losses put together could not possibly add up to the pain of loosing your son. i think the idea of your blog is a great thing. the idea of distracting yourself everyday from this disappointment is brilliant; a bitter-sweet if you ask me because time does not heal our wounds (no matter what anyone says- it doesn’t). i think it’s okay to put things like that on the back burner for awhile. you’ll have plenty of other time to look back and remember. and perhaps picking and choosing those times to reminisce and letting the tears flow then will be more convenient and even help with your mourning. I wish you all the best in your time with grief and hope that you’ll find some sense of peace/relief in your process. God bless you and everyone who is grieving and missing someone.
~Oceanhead
Comment by oceanhead — January 22, 2009 @ 9:55 pm |
Oceanhead, thanks so much for your kind words. I’m sorry for your losses, as well. And you’re right– it really is a matter of things getting easier with time, not ‘all better.’ Best to you, and thanks for stopping by.
Comment by bjw788898 — January 22, 2009 @ 11:06 pm |
And, so finally, I find you. You’ve commented at my blog many times now, and I always wondered who you were/are. I am so glad to find you in your own venue. Not so glad to know it’s because you also lost a son, but this is what we have, eh? I’ve not read your blog, nor your profile. I simply clicked here, and there you were/are. I know nothing. And, with the fact that you lost a son, just that, I know something about you. I know we have this in common, finally.
I can read now, of your loss, and I’m guessing, I will find out more about my own journey…through yours. I…am…so…sorry. I didn’t know…and now I do.
Wishing you peace, screaming, crying, smiles, and laughter on the path. Wishing you the freedom to feel your loss and your gifts.
Linda
Owen’s mom
Comment by Linda — October 16, 2009 @ 12:33 am |
Thank you for sharing your heart. I stumbled across your page in a search for “lyrics”.
I too am sorry you’ve had to travel this road. The unthinkable turn
Our Kathy died April 19, ’05. She was a Senior in HS.
I’ve shared your pages with a few friends, who are dad’s. There’s not that much info out there for them. I know in our own journey, just knowing someone else felt what we were feeling, seemed to make it “ok”. Not alright, but just “ok”.
~Patty
Comment by Kathy's mom — March 12, 2011 @ 6:44 pm |
Patty, I think having others to relate to makes all the difference. A great resource for dads is The Grieving Dads Project. http://www.grievingdads.com A grieving father started that project, and he has developed some amazing resources. I hope your friends can find comfort there, as well.
Comment by rjw788898 — March 14, 2011 @ 9:54 pm |
Hi Linda. I’m glad you found the blog and sorry that my email musn’t have gone through. I sent along the URL for the blog in response to your email. Thanks for sharing yours and your son’s journey for the world to see. And thanks for being interested in reading about mine as well. As a friend of mine says, we’re in this together, even though we’d never choose to be in this at all.
Do take care, and email or comment any time you like. It’s good to see you back online.
Comment by bjw788898 — October 16, 2009 @ 2:16 pm |